Letters & Testimonies

Victory in the area of anger

I want to share with you my testimony with regard to victory in a weak area in my soul area.  I have as a young child been exposed to many things that influenced who I was and although I excelled in almost everything I did, I was aware of a huge handicap inside of me.  As a result of sexual molestation as a 9 year old and having a father with a quick temper I grew up with this handicap that did not really surface in my everyday life, but did show up clearly in my relationships.

It was most devastating when I, as a young parent who so badly wanted to be the best mother ever, found myself lashing out at especially my firstborn.  I found I was hitting too hard, getting too angry and basically was, personally destroying my most precious possession, my family.  Whenever I got too angry, I hated myself and felt such condemnation, but even though I was a dedicated Christian, I did not know where to turn.

It was in this desperation that I phoned Glenda, one evening.  We spoke for barely 5-10 minutes and Glenda gave me some very basic tools with which to fight this battle that was raging inside of me.  She told me to pull out the root of the anger - forgive both my school principal and father for the damage done - which I have done many times in my life already - but this time I was going to do it in a desperate measure to come against the tree of anger that was rooted in me.  She also came against the anger in the Name of Jesus and cast down every thought that was not from the Holy Spirit and covered my thoughts with the Blood of Jesus.  With these basic tools, the Name of Jesus, the Blood of Jesus and forgiveness I started my journey towards healing in my soul.

It has been a long journey and at first I had to basically trust God to get me through each day, taking the days one by one.  When I climbed into bed at night aware that I walked in healing that day, I would ask God to help me through the next.  I fell often and had to pick myself from the mud again and again.  Each time I felt as if my healing would never come.  I will never forget the feeling when I, one evening realised it has been two weeks, two whole weeks that I have walked in healing, and then it became a month and later two months.  I still fell, but would always go to my children or husband and ask for forgiveness for losing my temper.  I was determined to make my temper bow its knee to the Holy Spirit within me.  Then it was 6 months and now I walk in healing and when ... only when and if I ever fall, getting angry in an ungodly way, I apologize, using the blood of Jesus and the Name of Jesus to bring restoration quickly, not giving Satan a foothold, that we as a family can walk in wholeness.

I have counseled many, many others and helped them to understand that emotional healing is very seldom instantly, it is rather a long process of fighting Satan as he will not easily give up the hold he has on you as .... if you can get healed, the way I became healed, you become incredibly dangerous to the kingdom of darkness as you have overcome BY THE BLOOD and now the sword that was stuck into you become a sword in your hand with which you can help others to come to wholeness.  Thank you Jesus for Your wonderful healing Word and that the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty to the pulling down of strongholds.

To Glenda, I can only say, thank you for teaching me how to fight for wholeness in my soul, OUR GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD.                  

Louise
Frontline Ministries, Port Elizabeth

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